Photographer : arimoore@flickr.com
On a good day, it’s a creepy leer, or a comment passed from one man to another. It’s about me, but it’s not to me. I can pretend that I haven’t heard it, that I’m not offended, that I’m not too scared to speak up for fear of what they might do next. On a bad day I won’t walk home from the station. I’ll catch a taxi, or hang around near security until I’m sure that the threat has passed.
I will attempt to avert the seemingly obligatory wolf whistles, the degrading comments, being tailed home and bombarded with unpleasant, sexually explicit gestures. I will collect these experiences, day in, day out, through no intention of my own but because it seems I must be particularly audacious to be female and on my own. But I’m not on my own, because this happens to thousands of women like me, every day.
Sexual harassment is an all too common experience for the women of Sydney. It takes many forms and can be hard to define, given that it generally relies upon whether the target feels threatened and offended or not. The Human Rights and Equal Opportunity Commission (HREOC) loosely defined sexual harassment as any sexual attention that is unwanted or uninvited. So wolf whistles, comments on a woman’s sexuality or personal appearance, ‘three blondes walked into a bar and did I mention they all had massive boobs?’, can all constitute harassment if they are taken offensively.
However, sexual harassment doesn’t only happen on the street. A HREOC report found that 41% of females and 18% of males are harassed at work. For the victim, consequences of sexual harassment may include decreased confidence, defamation of character and an increase in stress.
Although occasions of sexual harassment may be blatantly obvious, there can be some instances where a perpetrator may not be aware that a line has been crossed. So what of this person? If you’re confused about whether your behaviour towards women is harassing or flattering, consider how you would feel in their position. Think about how you might feel if you witnessed somebody behaving in a similar manner toward your girlfriend, sister or mother.
When a construction worker wolf whistled and said something obscene to Miranda Hobbs, she turned around and propositioned him, stating that all she needed was somebody she could take home and have her wicked way with. Hardly the most feminist reaction that a supposedly feminist show, Sex and the City, could have shown us.
Of course, we could instead take our cues from some newspaper tabloid bloggers, or women’s magazine columnists, who tell us we should be flattered when a man wolf whistles or discharges a sexual comment in our direction. According to them it’s because we’re just too damn beautiful for men to be able to approach us, they’re far too intimidated by our confidence and auras to be able to try for a genuine conversation. But there’s a nice little snap from a reader who comments, ‘of course you are going to like the wolf whistle, for you it’s the justification of your existence’.
So what to do, what to do, when somebody gives you a comment you neither need nor want? Some well meaning people have suggested not wearing revealing clothing in public. It looks like a pants suit on a forty degree day is the way to go. Catch public transport with another person, when you can, but I guess it sucks for you if you have to work and catch the train home afterward. Avoid volatile situations; how dare you go to a sporting match or a pub when there’s a footy game on? Above all, accept a compliment when one is given. Don’t you know that most girls would be flattered to know that they have such a nice bum?
But first, let me tell you about my right to walk down the street free from any sexist comments and actions. It should allow me to make it to the train and have a journey free from people staring at me. From there, I can walk into uni and know that anything I achieve, I do so because of my own merits and not on the basis of my sex. If I work, I know it will be in an environment where I’m not prevented from reaching my potential because I’m female. From there I can walk home if I want to, knowing I can make it there safely because I’m a valued, respected member of society, viewed and treated as an equal.
So if you think that a wolf whistle is a better option than a normal conversation, if you’re too intimidated to act like a human being, then leave me the hell alone. I won’t bite, but if this belief prevents you from harassing me, hold onto it.
